They Mess You Up with Dr. Ciara Kelly and Dr. Richard Hogan
GoLoud
A weekly podcast series presented by family doctor and broadcaster, Dr. Ciara Kelly & family psychotherapist and author, Dr. Richard Hogan. They Mess You Up is a straight-talking show that unpacks messy, everyday relationship and mental-health issues with a mix of clinical perspective, personal anecdotes and wry, no-nonsense banter. They cover topics from affairs, jealousy and people-pleasing to anxiety, parenting and dating after separation, with practical takeaways framed by the hosts’ professional experience. The show is a pragmatic guide to why people hurt each other - and themselves.
A weekly podcast series presented by family doctor and broadcaster, Dr. Ciara Kelly & family psychotherapist and author, Dr. Richard Hogan. They Mess You Up is a straight-talking show that unpacks messy, everyday relationship and mental-health issues with a mix of clinical perspective, personal anecdotes and wry, no-nonsense banter. They cover topics from affairs, jealousy and people-pleasing to anxiety, parenting and dating after separation, with practical takeaways framed by the hosts’ professional experience. The show is a pragmatic guide to why people hurt each other - and themselves.
Staying Together for the Kids
Episodes
Does staying in an unhappy relationship really protect your children, or can growing up around conflict, resentment and emotional distance do more damage than separation? Ciara Kelly and Richard Hogan explore when relationships reach breaking point, the impact of divorce on children, and how to put your kids first if you decide to walk away. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Anxiety is a normal part of life, but what happens when worry starts running the show? Ciara and Richard explore why we get anxious, how our thoughts fuel it, and what we can do to stop it taking over. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
We learn to pick apart our bodies from a young age, but how does that affect the way we see ourselves? Ciara and Richard discuss body image, diet culture, social media and how we can help ourselves and our children build a healthier relationship with our bodies. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Ever feel pressure to be perfect? Ciara and Richard explore the anxiety behind perfectionism, where it comes from, and how to stop tying your self-worth to getting everything right. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
A listener has had enough of dating apps and wants some advice. Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Why do we have thoughts that horrify us? And what do they actually mean? Ciara and Richard explain why intrusive thoughts can be so distressing, why having one doesn't mean you want to act on it, and how to stop getting caught in the cycle. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
When anxiety makes going to school feel impossible, how do you break the cycle of avoidance? Ciara and Richard discuss school refusal, anxiety, and how parents and schools can help young people find their way back. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
AI is becoming more than a tool, for some people, it's a friend, confidant or even a romantic partner. Ciara and Richard explore why we're turning to AI for connection and validation, and what that could mean for our mental health, relationships and children. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Narcissism is a term we throw around a lot, but what actually makes someone a narcissist? Ciara and Richard look at narcissistic personality disorder, how it plays out in families and relationships, and the red flags to watch for. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Is regret useful, or does it just keep us stuck in the past? Ciara and Richard explore the choices, missed opportunities and “what ifs” that can haunt us, and whether sometimes the biggest regret is the thing we didn't do. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits... The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
CAO results day can feel like the future has been decided by a single set of points for students and parents alike. But what happens when you don’t get the course you wanted? Ciara and Richard talk about disappointment, alternative routes and the very non-linear paths that can lead to a career and a life you never originally planned. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Why do we romanticise the person we didn't end up with? Ciara and Richard explore the “one that got away”, why our memories can make the past look better than it was, and whether we’re missing the person or the life we imagined with them. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
More adult children are living at home for longer, but how do you live with your kids when they're no longer kids? Ciara and Richard discuss rent, rules, partners staying over, boundaries and how to make it work without driving each other mad. They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Messy Bits: The weekly bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram message @TheyMessYouUpPod
Are we becoming less resilient or just more open about our struggles? Ciara and Richard discuss discomfort, resilience, parenting, and whether protecting ourselves from life's challenges is doing more harm than good. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The weekly bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram message @TheyMessYouUpPod
Is monogamy still realistic or are we expecting too much from one person? Ciara and Richard discuss open relationships, affairs, lifelong commitment, and whether monogamy still has a place in modern life.
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Choosing not to drink in Ireland can be harder than it sounds. Ciara and Richard discuss sober curiosity, social pressure, and why saying "no thanks" can make other people surprisingly uncomfortable. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Long-term love changes but does that mean attraction has to? Ciara and Richard discuss intimacy, resentment, communication, and why laughter might be one of the most overlooked parts of a healthy relationship. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Debt, rising bills, unequal incomes... Money has a way of creeping into every part of life. Ciara and Richard discuss financial stress, the arguments it causes, and why fairness matters more than splitting everything 50/50. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Not everyone wants a relationship but society still treats being single like something that needs fixing. Ciara and Richard discuss the pressure to find "the one," choosing to stay single, and whether a relationship is really the measure of a successful life. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode “Messy Bits” on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Feeling exhausted, cynical, irritable, or like you're barely keeping your head above water? It could be more than stress. Ciara and Richard discuss burnout, how it develops, and what we can do before it takes over. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday and a Bonus Episode on Mondays!
Messy Bits: The bonus episode where Ciara and Richard tackle your dilemmas, questions and messages. Send yours to us via Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod
Hi everyone - just dropping in between episodes here with a recommendation to help address a massive psychological issue that can actively wrecking your mental health: your terrible sleep hygiene. Lying awake at 3:00 AM overanalysing your life fuels anxiety, drives stress, and destabilises your mood. If you find it difficult nodding off, or just want to relax and actively down-regulate your nervous system, you need to check out GoLoud’s latest original stream GoLoud Sleep Sounds. This is a pragmatically designed tool featuring a calming collection of immersive, 10-hour soundscapes. Each episode has been carefully tailored for anyone looking for a calmer, healthier bedtime routine. The long-form, entirely uninterrupted audio is designed specifically to create a soothing environment that can be played through the night or used as a cognitive buffer zone during moments of rest and relaxation. There is absolutely no talking, no stories to stimulate your brain, and zero commercial ads to wake you up. Instead, it utilizes the ambient sounds of some of Ireland's most scenic spots to anchor your mind—transporting you to Curracloe Beach in spring, Howth Harbour at sunset, the Midlands on a stormy night, the Wicklow Mountains in winter, or Dublin after dark. This acoustic continuity allows your brain to shift out of high-alert survival mode and transition into deep, restorative sleep. Do something smart for your health tonight. Go to the GoLoud app or wherever you listen to your podcasts, find GoLoud Sleep Sounds, press play, put the phone down, and let it do the rest. Have a listen here: https://open.spotify.com/show/033wsfw3b3SrnBby4xyZhf?si=5307919513424ff3
From dyslexia and aging to sexuality and trauma, shame can leave people carrying burdens that were never theirs to begin with. Ciara and Richard discuss where shame comes from, how it takes hold, and what it takes to let it go. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday. And now a Bonus Episode 'Messy Bits' on Mondays!
Would you check your partner's phone? Does messaging someone else count as cheating? Ciara and Richard dive into the results of a listener survey on trust, infidelity, dating apps, and modern relationships. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
Friendship breakups can feel just as painful as romantic ones but we rarely talk about them. Ciara and Richard discuss rejection, awkwardness, shared friend groups, and why losing a friend can hit harder than people expect. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
Why do some people hide their sexuality for decades? Ciara and Richard unpack shame, fear, homophobia, and the emotional cost of living a life that doesn’t fully feel like your own. After Tommy Fleming’s interview with Ciara on Newstalk, where he discussed his sexuality and decision to come out at 55, they explore identity, secrecy, family expectations, and why it’s never too late to be honest about who you are. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
Ciara and Richard discuss “FAFO or F*ck Around and Find Out parenting,” how letting kids make mistakes might be better than stepping in to fix everything. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
Trying to merge two families can create tension, resentment, and pressure for both parents and children. In this episode, Ciara and Richard unpack the emotional reality of blended families and why forcing closeness too quickly can backfire. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
Is it too late to change your career? Or are you just afraid to try? In this episode career shifts, fear of failure, and the pressure to stay where you are. Ciara and Richard share their own career changes and how to make realistic moves towards work that feels fulfilling. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
After ending a long-term relationship in a moment of grief and low mood, a listener is left questioning everything when her ex moves on quickly. Ciara and Richard unpack whether it’s betrayal or consequence and what it takes to rebuild a relationship once it’s been broken. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
It’s often children who carry the emotional fallout when parents separate, especially when conflict, name-calling, and resentment take over. Ciara and Richard unpack the co-parenting behaviours that do real damage, and how to protect children from being caught in the middle. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
Why do siblings trigger us more than anyone else? Relationships can be shaped by comparison, labels, and family roles that follow us into adulthood. In this episode, Ciara and Richard Hogan unpack sibling rivalry, “family boxes,” and how to build healthier, more connected relationships at any age. Follow the pod and get in touch by sending a message on Instagram @TheyMessYouUpPod They Mess You Up, with Dr Ciara Kelly and Dr Richard Hogan, taking on the issues people struggle with behind closed doors. New episode every Wednesday.
